ara parisien

International Medium & Spiritual Teacher & Author


Eternally Yours

feel Our loved ones in Spirit walk with us each day. We are never left alone in our pain. They inspire us forward with an eternal desire that we may live in joy in spite of what we feel we have lost. Love…it never dies…and neither do we.




emotional pain 2
There will always be days when we will be lost in emotional pain. When others do or say something that touches a wound within us, we will feel the sear of it. When others do not keep promises, when others betray even the simplest of your wishes, the throbbing despair can last a lifetime and exacerbate your unwillingness to trust again.

Today, I am having one of those days. Generally, I post rainbows and sunshine so as to uplift and remind of the core of our true essence, however, this day a storm is raging within me. What keeps me going is the fact that rainbows always appear once the storm subsides.

I feel it is important to share, not so much the graphic detail of the why’s and wherefore’s of my unhappiness, but more the process of moving from despair to something that feels better. While I spend much of my time espousing the benefit of spirituality, I would be remiss if I didn’t provide the application of it.

Many times I have been told that as I am spiritual I do not understand emotional pain because I have never truly suffered. This is not true. We all have the opportunity to experience the pit of despair. It is what we do at these dark times that dictates whether we uplift ourselves sooner, or later. My spirituality has and shall remain, my lifeline. It is the proverbial bobbing log in the stormy sea that I may cling to and tread water. Yes, there are times when I feel I am drowning and definitely times when I feel like giving up. I only feel this way because I cannot identify what I must ‘do’ to effect an appropriate solution. My spirituality reminds me that I just need to ‘be’ and allow myself to feel whatever feelings are surfacing within as the emotions are showing me what wounds within me require my loving attention and inner healing. The art of ‘allowing’ things to be what they are is challenging and to compound it with allowing the pain to point a direction is almost unendurable. But I know, trust and believe that all is serving my greater good. There is a valuable gift meant just for me in the throes of agony.

While my human side is at odds with my world I remind myself that we are all being the best we can be in every moment. Even me. For each experience I have with emotional pain I understand that while I have come far, I still have a way to go. I begin to see that allowing the pain, without being mired in it, creates a pathway for me to walk through it. Denying it, cycling with it, and reinforcing my justification of it keeps me in the dark. It serves no purpose but to exacerbate pain.

In this moment I choose to remind myself that I am bigger than any challenge I face. I am more powerful than my pain. I will remind myself that what I feel is necessary and has nothing to do with anyone else. I claim the responsibility of my feelings. Trust will be an issue that will be addressed every step of the way. I realize that trust is not about other people. People do not need my permission to act or speak the way they wish. Trust is about trusting myself to handle whatever arrives in front of me.

There is a greater power in all of us if we just allow it to lead. In this moment, I will do just that. My human aspect of self will step aside and let the purity of love flood in. I choose to ride that mighty flow towards not only the solution I am seeking but toward my greater good. I know at some magical moment I will be able to release the proverbial log I have been clinging to and be grateful it kept me afloat in the sea of pain. The stormy waters have served their purpose as now I am more aware, I am growing, I am learning and above all, I am loved. It is this that allows me to erase the need to look at things as ‘right’ or ‘wrong’. It is this that nurtures me. It is this that carries me. What a wonderful feeling to know—‘it’ is me. With that knowledge I arrive back to my center of authentic power. Now I know the resonation upon which to dedicate my focus. My task now is to sustain that vibration and be gentle with myself if I slip back into something that doesn’t feel good. It is all a process. It is never a quick fix. I am committed to work through this process because I believe I am worth the dignity of my own efforts.

Thank you for taking the time to read this lengthy post as it helps me to know that someone might find it of benefit in their life. Being of service is never far from my heart–even in darkness. We are all in this cosmic soup together. We should be there for one another. Thanks for being there for me.

Now….I am off to look for rainbows.

1 Comment

Emotional Pain

emotional pain

There are moments that burst forth in a day where pain is so prevalent all around. It is compartmentalized in that there is my pain, your pain and everyone else’s pain. No matter what the cause or who it is it can serve to debilitate and fracture at the very core of Being.

I ask myself in moments like this as to why I must feel a depth of despair, the agony of anguish or penultimate pain. The answer, while wise, does little to soothe a heart in the throes of such upheaval. Nor is it readily understood by many.

The answer is, “Because it is there to serve you.” How can pain serve anyone? It can, if you understand that the only way pain can be felt and expressed is if it is in you to begin with. When another says or does something that causes us emotional pain they are never the culprit. They are merely touching wounds that are already existing within us. Because we may be unaware we feel put upon when emotional pain strikes. It is lovingly being shown to us so that we may tend to it and heal it. It was never meant to be crippling or paralyzing.

Emotional pain. It is a window to our enlightenment. It is not a cage nor a trap. It can be the precursor to our very freedom if we acknowledge it, feel it, walk through it and transmute it. Facing the fear of it and the feeling of it is where we find our authentic power. Can you imagine how the world would change if we all did this instead of blaming others as to why we hurt?

1 Comment


Empaths! We have all heard the term. It might surprise you that we are all empathic. Being we are all the same energy how could we not feel the shift in vibrations of another although some may be more sensitive than others. I have often been asked what an empath can do to lessen the impact of another’s energy. It’s really quite simple. Be more mindful of what you are contributing vibrationally than what you might ‘get’ from someone else. It is as simple as a shift. It is more apt, perhaps, to understand what you think the role of ’empath’ entails. Some have told me they are to feel another’s pain so that they might know who is need of healing, of love, of guidance. To this I say we all are in need of this. No one is immune.

To look at this further, like attracts like. It is the Law of Attraction. If you are an ’empath’ believing you are here to identify and acknowledge someone’s pain and suffering then that is what you will attract. It begins with you and the responsibility stays with you. To believe that your day, week or month has not gone well because you were absorbing other people’s stuff and it has affected you in a challenging way is just another way of saying, “It’s someone else’s fault–it has nothing to do with me–it’s just my lot in life.”

It is not the job of the empath to absorb energy and carry it forever and a day. What is the use of this? How does this help? You cannot absorb enough pain and suffering to make another well. I have yet to hear an empath walk into a room and say, “Ohhh I feel someone is very joyful! I want to figure out who it is and be near them!” It’s not like it can’t be done. We have just given the lower vibrational energy more ‘air time’ and because we are all so immersed in our day to day dramas our vibration is usually in the basement anyway! It also means that we believe our intent, and perhaps our purpose is to be the laser beam that ferrets out suffering. But to what end.

We all are the same energy. We all have times we could benefit from a kind word, a gentle hug or words of encouragement. We should be offering all of these things to each other anyway just as a matter of course–because we all deserve it.

If you consider yourself an empath and want to stop absorbing another’s energy then I would suggest that a more intimate and in-depth knowledge of Self would be in order. Other’s might suggest protection–which is another article altogether but I will lightly touch upon it here–and I would say, “Protection from what?” The answer would be ‘protection from the part of you that you do not know.’ Surprising? You will always feel the need for protection when you are dealing with something that feels foreign to you. Which simply is another way of stating that you might not yet be aligned with the wisdom of who you are, what you are and how powerful you are. It also states that you are not in tune with the energy that you are. Energy is everything. Your vibration of the energy that is you is what dictates your experience. Your experience is never predicated on what someone has done, hasn’t done, will do, or their vibration. It’s all you.

Get to know Self. Know the energy that you are. Focus more on what you are contributing energetically and stop worrying about what you are ‘getting.’ When you shift your vibration in this way your experiences shift with it. When you begin to walk into who you truly are you are more apt to make the impact you are seeking to make and will do so in a more powerful and positive way. That is what we should do and be not only for ourselves but for each other.